Oldest online dating cliche in the book

Ok, anyone who has been reading this blog knows I am not a big fan of online dating. But after relentlessly getting spammed by Chemistry.com, I decided to give this service a try. Immediately I got 29 messages from "Men who want to meet me."
Here are a sampling of the tepid personal ad cliches that have arrived in my in box so far. I wish these guys would say something halfway original so I have some sort of clue as to who the human being behind the cliche might be. With generic names like "Ralph" and "Bill" and these deadly dull headlines, I really don't have much to go on.
By the way, I am not making this up. These are real, authentic responses to my personal ad. Aaaaack!
Who would you click on?
Looking for you
The one you've been waiting for!
Adventure Awaits
Total intimacy
“Cold hands, warm heart”
Looking for a connection
Passion and Adventure
WORLD'S GREATEST GUY (The whole letter is written in ALL CAPS and I imagine a guy who shouts a lot.)
Me Tarzan, You Jane
Sincere, Compassionate, and Sensitive Man
Nicest guy you will ever meet
Have broom. Ready to sweep. (You. Off your feet.) <<---ok, this one is at least kind of clever. In a "groooooan" knock knok joke kind of way.
And...drum roll please....
Your search is over!
Aaaaaaaagh! Delete, delete! And I'm supposed to pay money for this?
Here's a blogger's advice on tired dating cliches to avoid.
http://online-dating.suite101.com/article.cfm/online_dating_profile_cliches
Holding hands while walking on the beach in the sunset, anybody?

2 comments:
I tried to email you at brain_dancer at yahoo but your account "has been disabled or discontinued"
You see a problem with the men writing these headlines. I see a problem with you having unrealistic expectations and a lack of compassion. Yes, there is nothing particularly creative or original about "Sincere, Compassionate, and Sensitive Man" but when you look back at the guys you dated before online dating, would you have broken up with them because they would use those words to describe themselves? Is it really so awful that a man would write to you "Looking for a connection"?
I met the perfect woman years ago, but she was looking for the perfect man. When you meet the perfect man, don't be surprised if he's looking for the perfect woman. Are you perfect?
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